Tip of the cap to the illustrious HipCityReg for introducing that concepts of “meditations” as a focal point for the concepts that we are comfortable splashing around with in the kiddie pool of thought and friendly discussion but we are still resisting really diving into the deep end of actual work that would interact with the world in a more serious way.

This is a meditation on the about page. I’ve written quite a few about pages for blogs that never worked, or that worked and were broken immediately after, or are on wordpress sites and medium posts that would now be comfortably categorized as “juvenalia” (which is not to say that I won’t remix them later!). Not to be confused, as I made a spelling error and almost almost was with the greek and roman festival for pre-adulthood.

As someone who went (briefly) to a private liberal arts school aka a PWI (Private White Institution, see how white exactly here) writing an “About Me” should be a very tidy undertaking. The “About Me” also exists, albeit in an intellectualized way, as the discussion of scholarly methods or theory involved in an research paper. But if you didn’t apply to this kind of school, you should know that an “About Me” was by far the most common was fucking interminable essays you wrote in order to get into these institutions.

I say that to say this: in previous contexts I operated in the “About Me” is a glorified resume, a place to strategically brag, the way that you edgewise qualify yourself to exist in certain spaces, a wealthy white people way of asking you where you stay, your momma stay. Like the intro on that Kendrick Lamar song.

That was the that. Anyway, the “this” that I’m talking about is that you, beloved reader, got this far and if more than half of this made sense to you, then we can share a space where we can identify intellectually with each other (cautiously). Hopefully you’re amused and you’ll read whatever comes next.

If a lot of this unfamiliar to you, then I think, frankly, we share a lot of the same confusion, not on the subject matter, but on why tf does this matter, why is this necessary. What’s more, an “About Me” should be checked up on by asking around the to see who knows me and what they have to say about them. If you’re that curious, I’ll provide references.

Previous known addresses: Vermont (so small doesn’t require qualification), southern Arizona, central Ohio, New York City, (City of) San Francisco, KCMO (briefly), Seattle. Vermont and Seattle are both very close to Canada. I think there’s something to unpack there.

Work experience summed-up through people i worked with: parent-funded entrepreneurs and ambitious cooks plus illegal immigrants and teens, not quite making it retirees and older teens, college aged youth and program directors, military brats, academic professionals, recent graduates/underemployed, ex-department store managers and leather factory managemers from India turned tailors, custom tailors, anybody willing to sell merchant cash advance loans, tech recruiters, inimitable mix of restaurant employees, ayurvedic yoga devotees, NYC real estate agents, San Francisco tech people (ex-consultants, new college grads, pre-millionaires, millionaires, a billionaire guest appearance), NOBODY, small family law office, former college classmates, long-time business employees and factory workers, more restaurant people, and, (my preference) trusted friends and extended family–and more restaurant people. Resume available on request. This is more exhaustive than that.

My hobbies are either annoyingly esoteric, expensive, or boring (not hiking!).

THIS is what I do for fun. Queasy face emoji.

Football: Patriots, get over it. I also root for the ravens and hawks. Baseball: Redsox, everyone’s over it. Mariners are there. Basketball: KNICKS. Should’ve lead with this. Pro-LeBron. Also, bandwagon.

iPhone, Mac, Chromebook… Linux, I tried. Queasy face emoji.

Wine: probably go old world first. Beer: Budweiser, Modelo Especial, “craft” lager, wildly fermented farmhouse ale (all problematic, except maybe for modelo). Spirits: Tequila (100 per cent puro de agave STRONGLY preferred), but also everything else.

Jekyll, Netlify, Ruby, Python (barely, applies to all).

This is enough about me that you could probably come stalk and kill me, so do what you gotta do, but do it fast. Issa coin flip.